10. Your senior copywriter begins everything with “Is this a dagger which I see before me,
the handle toward my hand? Come, let me clutch thee! I have thee not, and yet I see thee still.
9. It combines the best elements of Housewives of New Jersey, Kate Plus 8, Extreme Couponing, Sarah Palin’s Alaska, and Toddlers and Tiaras.
8. Your first choice for spokesperson is the guy who played Potsy on “Happy Days”.
7. Your client’s competition is offering to chip in to buy your client more media time.
6. Homeless people and drunks in parks are the only ones singing your new jingle.
5. It only takes one monkey at one typewriter one hour to come up with something better than what you just presented.
4. You are t
rying to sell your client on a big “Going out of Business” campaign.
3. Your kid’s tell their friends you’re a Barista at Starbucks.
2. Your art director sneaks out in the middle of t
he campaign to become the new human cannonball at the circus.
1. Even actors and headhunters avoid you at parties.
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#10. “For all your dagger needs.”